I’m turning 66 this Saturday. That’s not a big surprise to those who know me. I’m not shy about celebrating my birthday month or sharing my age with people. Many people might say I overdo it. Celebrating your day of birth for an entire month may be considered self-indulgent, selfish, and self-involved. I say that it’s a great way to reward yourself for making it through another year, reflecting on all the things you’ve accomplished, and taking stock of what you’d still like to do.
I must admit that this year, I couldn’t quite decide what to do. I typically have a theme or a plan of things I want to do. This year, I felt uninspired. I’ve been having trouble moving forward with almost everything. I have plenty to do, but somehow I couldn’t seem to get motivated to start anything. This inaction let the birthday month arrive with no plans. With all that’s going on in the world, it seemed more indulgent than ever to be celebrating myself every day.
When June 1st rolled around, I was greeted by a glass jar labeled “Your Magical Mystery Birthday Month Jar!” and a stack of notes bound by a rubber band. My ever-creative wife, Diana, had filled this jar with folded handwritten notes. Each note contained an idea for what to do each day. She gave me the direction that if I didn’t like the one I picked, I could keep picking until I found the one right for that day. If I chose one that I wanted to do at a later date, I could set that aside.
This whole idea made me smile and giggle with glee. How fun to choose an adventure every day. The first day, I picked “Private Joni Mitchell Backstage Pass Day – music, videos, movies, food, and drinks all inspired by Joni – up close and personal.” What!?! As a raving Joni fan, this made me seriously happy. We turned on Apple Music and listened to non-stop Joni. We watched a few documentaries, ate oranges, drank tea with honey, and had a great time. It was simple but perfect.
The other stack of notes was filled with something each day that Diana liked about me. This was very sweet and certainly helped build up my self-esteem. Opening one each day made me feel very special and loved.
Some of the things we’ve done are go to new parks and have a picnic, enjoy our breakfast or lunch on the veranda, take a drive to somewhere new, have afternoon tea with friends, eat cheeseburgers, eat tons of cherries, have cocktails with friends, meals with friends, try new recipes, and much more.
Many of these notes that Diana left me gave me time by myself to read, draw, paint, or do nothing. I’ve spent a lot of time walking to the beach by myself due to Diana’s ankle injury. This has forced me, without realizing it, to reflect a little deeper on my birthday month. I made a list of the things I’ll be focusing on in the upcoming year.
Be Open To New Things & New People TODAY
No more “I’ll do that next week, next month, next year.” When opportunities present themselves I’ll get my butt out there and stop making excuses. I’m going to ask more questions and get to know people better.
I often think I want to do something, and then later wish I could just stay home. I am a Cancer crab after all, safe and secure in her comfortable self-created shell. Forcing myself out of that shell inevitably ends up feeling good.
Make The Change TODAY
They say you have to do something for at least a month or more before it becomes a habit. I believe it. I made a goal to walk at least 5 miles (8 kilometers) every day last year. Most days, I still do it. The days that I miss, I don’t feel as good, and I don’t sleep as well. I know it makes a difference in my life, so I do it.
Deciding what you want to change about your life and doing it will give you a huge sense of accomplishment.
Plan That Trip and Take It TODAY
We moved to Europe in part so we could travel easily and affordably throughout this region. We’ve taken many trips already, and we see many older people struggling to navigate places they’ve waited their whole lives to see. It’s essential to make time to travel and see the world as early in your life as possible. Don’t wait!
We’ve done several trips, but there are still many places we want to see. We sat down and made a list of the places we want to go and when we can do that.
Make That Call TODAY
One thing I did during my morning walks was record short videos to send to people I hadn’t talked to in a while. At about a minute or less, I took the time to say hello, tell them I missed them, and send a short message on what’s going on with us. It was like leaving a video voicemail, and everyone seemed to enjoy it.
Sending someone a short note will make their day and help keep your connection strong.
Forgive Yourself TODAY
I think one of the reasons I couldn’t decide what to do this month was that I just felt like, at this point in my life, I should have done more, been better, loved better, created more. Growing older prompts reflection on your past, your present, and what you’ll leave behind when you’re gone. The reality is that I’ve accomplished a great deal, more than most, been a good person, have a loving wife, and we’ve made a good life together.
Sometimes we are too hard on ourselves. As Joni Mitchell said, “Nobody’s harder on me than me, how could they be, nobody’s harder on you than you.” Taking stock every now and then is a good idea. Talking to old friends who know you helps to keep you grounded and appreciated.
I want to thank all my friends who helped me celebrate my birthday month. Even if we didn’t get to see each other in real life, you sent notes, left messages, and I felt all the love. The ones I did get to see, we laughed, we gossiped, and we shared precious time together. That’s what birthday month is all about.
I strive to live the best life I can each day. Being grateful for my sixty-six years on this planet, I try to ignore the little aches and pains that make it just a bit harder to get out of bed each morning. As my Uncle Ed used to say, “Getting old isn’t for wimps,” and boy was he right.
BONUS IDEA: I belong to a lot of online painting groups. One group leader came up with the idea to create a calendar with two-inch by two-inch squares for each day. Each day, you could draw or paint something, anything, so that you create something each day. I took that idea and decided I could fill each day with something that I did that day or something that happened during birthday month. It’s been a fun experiment. Completing each day doesn’t take much time. I now have a calendar full of reminders. A friend suggested that I frame it, and I just might.
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